Monday, October 31, 2005

Who R You?



While I may say fuck more than a sailor I’d like to think that I do have some manners in mixed company. For example, I’d never inquire into someone’s reproductive plans by saying something like, “So when are you going to have a girl?”

Cuz the person I’m asking may not be civil and look over at his wife and say, “I already have a girl”

That person might be stifling the urge to say, “When are you going to stop over-feeding your obese family and taxing the health care system and raising our premiums you stupid fat fuck!”

Luckily I have manners(ish)

So on Sunday I was feeling so damn social I went for a ride el solo. I was gonna maragachimi ride but there was not bartender at aunt chiladas so I just went to Exxon and got a Mickeys and some Corn Nuts to eat on the canal on my way home. I’m feeling much better now.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Itch Scratched


For the moment.
Phx sucks as far as urban bike culture goes. Maybe it's there and not finding me.
I doubt it.
Part of it is my fault but I've been on one - yes -one bars on bikes since we moved here over two years ago and now one happy hour BOB. WTF is that?
Gawdamn car culture.





and WTF, two liberalish and one staunchish repub? A full dbl squishy Intense, a leMonde and my sirrus.
Don't get me wrong - not a complaint.

Just wondering where the ghetto ss, bar hoppin, titty bar hittin tour is?






Oh wait, we did that last time.
I guess we're on a roll.
We just need to roll more.
roger wilco 10-4 over and out

Thrill kill kult


Tomorrow is harvest day.....but to them it is the Holocaust

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Doggie doo in your shoe


Aye que mal perro

I’ve been commuting to work on my bike since I dislocated my shoulder in May (mountain biking mishap) and since that time I’ve developed a relationship with a black and white dog on my route. The relationship started out healthy, a friendly chase and a sprint on the bike. One morning the dog was asleep on the curb and I thought I'd return the favor of an endorphin rush so as I passed, I leaned over and yelled AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

He didn’t like that.

He fell off the curb and came up barking like mad but I was too far away for a decent chase.

The next morning the bugger saw me coming from about 20 yards away so I hightailed it right at him and peeled away at the last minute. He couldn’t match the speed or the turn. I thought we were friends again.

About a week later he saw me coming from 70 yards away and went into a crouch

“Oh shit” I thought to myself. Oh shit indeed, he knew my trick and was ready for me and damn near got a chunk.

This friendship is over; he wanted a taste.

I called animal control and in a rare display of gubbermint inaction, I mean, in action they were at the house on my way home. Owner was cited yadda yadda. I thought my troubles were over. Nay.

On Tuesday he was back sporting a collar (and hopefully shots). OK, the fukcer is getting mace this time. I get off the bike and this makes him stop in his tracks and just out of reach of the spray but I let a burst go anyway. Hmm, I should at least be able to sense the stuff. Nada. I sniff the nozzle, nada. But he backs away and I ride off with my skin intact.




Animal control is called again and a trip to the police uniform store is made to secure some real Mace. Horale mal perro – bring it on - I’m ready

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Sweat beads on your inner needs

Well the ride did not go as planned. I DNF’d at about mile 80 near Peppersauce Cave. I started having trouble at mile 60 but I didn’t want to call it yet. Disappointed? A little. I still had an awesome time. It was a very surreal ride.

  • Starting in the dark with 100 of your closest friends
  • Watching the sun come up over San Manuel Valley
  • Seeing some dude gnawing a huge summer sausage at aid station #2 and asking if anyone wanted some horse cock
  • Another dude lamenting that he looked over to see said horse cock
  • The cops taking down some guy at El Conquistador at 2am (I was leaving for the race)
  • The camaraderie on the trail, when folks were stopped everyone was making sure all was well. I donated some co2 to an SSer on his 3rd flat (poor bastard).

Cooper started having trouble that was compounded by duralier problems and I think he called it a few miles after aid station #4. I saw him in the sag van as they passed and asked me if I needed anything. I was too loopy to realize what I needed at that point but I managed to accept a bottle of really cold water which was nice. Still a helluva good day on the bike. My mom was in town to visit and enabled us to stay in the lap of luxury and help entertain Tate. The three of them were at the finish when I got there. They all wanted to chat about the race and I just wanted to crawl into a hole for a bit so I sent them back to the hotel while I tried to take stock – it didn’t work. I almost left without loading my bike and then I almost left without my front tire and almost ran it over. Yea I was tired and I’m still trying to take stock.





El Conquistador was nice and I slunk back there after the race for a shower and a trip to Pizzria Uno’s that I barely remember. In the morning I woke up to a painful sunburn and a hot stone massage at the resort – good stuff – at least what I remember


Friday, October 21, 2005

You are being watched



Sleuths Crack Tracking Code Discovered in Color Printers

By Mike Musgrove
Washington Post Staff Writer
Wednesday, October 19, 2005; Page D01

It sounds like a conspiracy theory, but it isn't. The pages coming out of your color printer may contain hidden information that could be used to track you down if you ever cross the U.S. government.

Last year, an article in PC World magazine pointed out that printouts from many color laser printers contained yellow dots scattered across the page, viewable only with a special kind of flashlight. The article quoted a senior researcher at Xerox Corp. as saying the dots contain information useful to law-enforcement authorities, a secret digital "license tag" for tracking down criminals.

The content of the coded information was supposed to be a secret, available only to agencies looking for counterfeiters who use color printers.

Now, the secret is out.

Yesterday, the Electronic Frontier Foundation, a San Francisco consumer privacy group, said it had cracked the code used in a widely used line of Xerox printers, an invisible bar code of sorts that contains the serial number of the printer as well as the date and time a document was printed.

With the Xerox printers, the information appears as a pattern of yellow dots, each only a millimeter wide and visible only with a magnifying glass and a blue light.

The EFF said it has identified similar coding on pages printed from nearly every major printer manufacturer, including Hewlett-Packard Co., though its team has so far cracked the codes for only one type of Xerox printer.

The U.S. Secret Service acknowledged yesterday that the markings, which are not visible to the human eye, are there, but it played down the use for invading privacy.

"It's strictly a countermeasure to prevent illegal activity specific to counterfeiting," agency spokesman Eric Zahren said. "It's to protect our currency and to protect people's hard-earned money."

It's unclear whether the yellow-dot codes have ever been used to make an arrest. And no one would say how long the codes have been in use. But Seth Schoen, the EFF technologist who led the organization's research, said he had seen the coding on documents produced by printers that were at least 10 years old.

"It seems like someone in the government has managed to have a lot of influence in printing technology," he said.

Xerox spokesman Bill McKee confirmed the existence of the hidden codes, but he said the company was simply assisting an agency that asked for help. McKee said the program was part of a cooperation with government agencies, competing manufacturers and a "consortium of banks," but would not provide further details. HP said in a statement that it is involved in anti-counterfeiting measures and supports the cooperation between the printer industry and those who are working to reduce counterfeiting.

Schoen said that the existence of the encoded information could be a threat to people who live in repressive governments or those who have a legitimate need for privacy. It reminds him, he said, of a program the Soviet Union once had in place to record sample typewriter printouts in hopes of tracking the origins of underground, self-published literature.

"It's disturbing that something on this scale, with so many privacy implications, happened with such a tiny amount of publicity," Schoen said.

And it's not as if the information is encrypted in a highly secure fashion, Schoen said. The EFF spent months collecting samples from printers around the world and then handed them off to an intern, who came back with the results in about a week.

"We were able to break this code very rapidly," Schoen said.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Got Soul?


Game on.

So next weekend is the big race - my first 100 miler in the dirt with a measley 14K feet of climbing. Gonna be a long fun, painful, surreal day on the bike.



I did about a 100 miles on my touring bike last weekend but it just ain't the same. All I wanna do at the Soul Ride is finish.

I've done this event every year and the 100 is the only event I haven't done. Lucky for me some of my brain damaged friends are also riding, so misery will have company.

Maybe we sould have a better training program.......



















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